What happens when your child doesn’t get the playing time they want?

For many families, that’s where frustration begins. But for BTG Basketball founder Justin Furtado, it may also be where some of the most important growth happens.

In this episode, Justin joins Rhett Parker for a thoughtful conversation about resilience, failure, playing time, and the role parents play in helping young athletes navigate adversity. Together, they explore why sitting the bench isn’t always a problem to solve, why discomfort can be an important teacher, and how sports prepare kids for challenges far beyond the field or court.

The conversation also dives into finding the right competitive level, helping athletes advocate for themselves, and the tension between what parents see through the lens of their child and what coaches see through the lens of the team. If you’ve ever struggled with playing time, team fit, or knowing when to step in as a parent, this episode offers an honest perspective on what youth sports can teach when things don’t go according to plan.

“Pain is a part of life. Sports is the safest place to experience it.”

Subscribe

• Apple Podcasts

• Spotify

• YouTube

Guest Resources

• BTG Basketball

• Beyond the Scoreboard Podcast

• Instagram: @btg_basketball

• Instagram: @thebeyondthescoreboard

• Instagram: @coachfurtadoo

Key Takeaways

What This Episode Explores

• Protecting kids from every disappointment may prevent them from developing resilience.

• The bench can teach leadership, perspective, and perseverance in ways success often cannot.

• Parents naturally view sports through the lens of their child, while coaches must view it through the lens of the team.

• Playing at the right level is often more valuable than chasing the highest level.

• Learning to advocate for yourself is one of the most important life skills sports can provide.

Soundbites

• “Pain is a part of life. Sports is the safest place to experience it.”

• “The bench and pain and losing is the most important part of sports, not winning.”

• “Parents are watching their child. Coaches are watching the team.”

• “The bill comes due at some point.”

• “If I let the bench define me, BTG Basketball never exists.”

• “You cannot push your way through sports forever.”

Episode Breakdown with Timestamps

Watch on YouTube or Listen on Apple or Spotify and follow along

[00:01] Beyond the Game

• Justin shares the mission behind BTG Basketball.

• Why youth sports should prepare athletes for life after sports.

• The importance of focusing on personal development, not just athletic achievement.

[03:15] Finding the Right Competitive Level

• The growing gap between recreational sports and elite travel programs.

• Why being challenged is important, but being overwhelmed can be harmful.

• The value of playing meaningful, competitive games.

[06:45] Chasing the Highest Level

• Parents often believe higher levels automatically mean better development.

• Why some athletes benefit from moving up while others need the right environment to grow.

• The importance of honesty from coaches when helping families make decisions.

[11:20] What Parents Are Getting Wrong

• Justin identifies the biggest mistake he sees from parents.

• Why shielding kids from discomfort may create bigger challenges later.

• Sports as a safe place to experience adversity.

[13:45] Playing Time and Expectations

• How coaches can better communicate expectations.

• What athletes need to do to earn opportunities.

• Why clarity can prevent many playing time conflicts.

[15:30] The Parent-Coach Relationship

• Rhett shares his philosophy on parent involvement.

• Why athletes should be encouraged to advocate for themselves.

• The difference between supporting your child and fighting their battles.

[18:40] Multi-Sport Athletes and Real Life Balance

• The pressure many young athletes feel to specialize.

• Why some coaches forget that kids have other interests.

• The importance of meeting athletes where they are.

[23:00] Are We Losing the Point?

• Why not every athlete needs elite-level expectations.

• The role of fun, friendships, and belonging in youth sports.

• Helping kids become lifelong fans of the game.

[25:15] Lessons From the Bench

• Justin reflects on spending his senior season on the bench.

• Rhett shares his own experience being benched in college.

• How setbacks often become defining moments years later.

[29:00] A Parent’s Quiet Support

• Rhett tells the story of his father driving hours to games where he rarely played.

• A powerful example of support without interference.

• What unconditional encouragement can look like in sports.

[31:00] Helping Athletes Navigate Adversity

• Practical advice for parents facing playing time frustrations.

• Questions families should ask before stepping in.

• Why resilience may be one of the most valuable outcomes of sports.

Final Reflection

Every parent wants to protect their child from disappointment.

But some of the most meaningful lessons in youth sports come from the moments we wish we could take away.

The bench. The losses. The difficult conversations. The setbacks.

Those moments often become the experiences that teach athletes how to handle adversity, advocate for themselves, and keep moving forward when things don’t go their way.

Sometimes the lesson isn’t in avoiding the struggle.

It’s in learning how to grow through it.

Call to Action

If this episode resonated with you, share it with a parent, coach, or athlete navigating the challenges of youth sports.

Subscribe, follow the show, and join us as we continue exploring what it really means to survive youth sports.